


The Pet Cat Excuse

by Saral_Hylor



Category: The Losers - All Media Types
Genre: Betting, Drabble, Humor, M/M, Pointless funny scene, Pre-Slash, bad excuses to get out of situations, because that's what team mates do
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-12
Updated: 2013-08-12
Packaged: 2017-12-23 06:04:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/922866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saral_Hylor/pseuds/Saral_Hylor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's one of those bad excuses, like "sorry, I can't go home with you, I have to feed my cat" or "I can't come to your wedding, I'll be busy washing my hair that day"; those excuses to get you out of situations you don't really want to be in. </p>
<p>Or, in which Pooch has had enough of the UST and oblivious mutual pining, so drastic measures have to be taken.</p>
<p>Alternatively, in which Jake Jensen receives a proposition and is forced to confront his feelings for a certain... cat...</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Pet Cat Excuse

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Cougars_catnip](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cougars_catnip/gifts), [quandong_crumble](https://archiveofourown.org/users/quandong_crumble/gifts).



> This was just a random idea that came to me, I never intended to post it, but I shared it with two great girls, and they encouraged me to post it. Because it's funny, and it made them smile, and so I need to share the happy. 
> 
> And so, it is dedicated to CC and quandong, because, see, I can do pointless happy!
> 
>  
> 
> Also unbeta'd because I couldn't wait, and it's only short.

The woman leaned a little closer, drink tilting dangerously to one side, free hand trailing along Jensen’s shoulder and down over his chest, and no, he did not squeak when she quite shamelessly groped him. Okay, maybe he did squeak, but it was a manly squeak.

It wasn't that he didn't like the attention, though it was a bit on the 'rare to nearly extinct' side of being a likely occurrence. So, maybe he wasn’t enjoying the attention all that much, but in his defence she was very drunk, and that was in so many ways a bad thing, he wasn’t nearly drunk enough, and stuff like this didn’t happen very often. Cougar, Cougar was the one women threw themselves at, not him. But Cougar wasn’t there, he had been, before, earlier in the night, they’d been at the bar together, and that was good, that was expected and normal, for them anyway. Jensen tried to turn around to look behind him, because that sneaky ninja sniper had to be there somewhere, still, hopefully, though it was just as likely that he’d already picked up some lovely lady and gone home with her. Or two, three, hell, the sexy fucker had probably picked up six and had gone off to have an orgy. And, for some reason, that thought felt like a cold punch in his gut.

“So, cute-stuff, you got a room around here somewhere that we can go to?” The woman purred, lips brushing against the corner of his mouth.

He didn’t mean to flinch, not really, he just wanted his personal space back, thank you very much. Only certain people were allowed that close. Like Jess, and Beth. And Cougar. Settling both hands on her shoulders, mindful of where he was placing them, he did not need to be accused of sexual harassment, not tonight. “I’m sor – you seem like a lovely girl, but – uh – this isn’t going to work out, you see, thing is, I have a – cat?” _Cougar._ “Well, shit.”

The woman backed off, looking mildly put out and rather confused, as Jensen was pretty sure he was doing his best impersonation of a startled goldfish. He had a Cougar. Well, no, not yet, but he wanted one. Oh fuck. He had to find him. Like right now. He had no idea what he’d do once he did, but getting away from the, admittedly gorgeous, woman and finding his sniper seemed to be the only thing that mattered.

“Sorry, excuse me, I have to go. Sorry.”

The woman sat back down at the bar with an amused smirk, watching the blond beat a hasty retreat from the bar, searching frantically for someone before slipping outside. She didn’t look up when someone sat down next to her, just held out her hand and took the fifty that was given to her. That was the easiest few rounds of drinks she’d ever got.

Clay and Aisha watched from the end of the bar, seeing how things unfolded until Jensen went racing out the bar, and Pooch paid the woman for her services. Clay thought she should try her hand at acting, because she played drunk rather well. The spirit of the moment was ruined by Aisha clearing her throat and holding out her hand. Bloody woman, would either send him broke or to the grave. He handed over the hundred he’d bet. “How’d you know?”

“Women’s intuition?” Aisha smirked, tucking the money away safely in her pocket. “Plus it was so obvious the boy had it bad.”

“Yeah, but it was Pooch’s plan that I was questioning. Though who knows how it’ll go when Jensen actually finds Cougar.”

“Please, that crazy Mexican was probably waiting outside the bar and would have jumped the idiot as soon as he was out the door.”

“When did we go from soldiers to a match making service? Sometimes I don’t think I get paid enough to deal with this shit.” Clay took another mouthful of beer, but did glance briefly over at the door, not that he wanted to see anything.

Aisha patted his arm, face painted in mock sympathy, “Aw, Papi, don’t you know, you don’t get paid at all.”

“Touché.”


End file.
